In approaching the new year, I invite you to rewind your calendar and consider...your marital performance in 2023.
What if I asked your spouse what it was like being married to YOU this past year?
Yikes!
If my spouse chose to be fully open and honest I think I'd have plenty of... ehemmm... "growth-opportunities". :)
Seriously though... feel free to go back through your calendar and check out what your priorities were throughout the year.
Day by day. Week by week. Month by month.
What was it like being married to YOU?
If marriage is your first human assignment, was that reflected in...
How you spent your time?
How you spoke/listened to them?
How you spent your energy?
How you loved them the way he or she receives love?
Assume you're looking at your year through your spouse's eyes.
What were your challenges of the year?
What were the things you should celebrate?
Now that you have thought through that...
We all know marriages are under attack, so what are you doing about it in your own home? You want it strong to withstand the challenges.
& If you're a pastor or ministry leader, what are you doing about this for your flock or in your organization?
(Aside: We have some exciting resources for ministry leaders that we'll be sharing with you in upcoming communications -- make sure you're on our email list to get notifications.)
In this episode, I have some practical next steps and things to ponder as you're setting out into this fresh year.
Love & Blessings,
Belah
PS - We'd love to help heal your marriage in 2024 (as has happened many times before), feel free to take us up on our gift to you: Clarity Call. delightyourmarriage.com/cc
As we are soon gathering together with loved ones to celebrate the Savior's birth, I would love for you to remember what life is all about.
When we meet Jesus face to face, what do we want to be true of us?
In today's episode, I walk you through a meditation I did with our men's graduate group a couple of months ago.
It is really meant to give you a chance to consider eternity. What is Christmas really about?
It's about Jesus. And are we living in light of His life, will and ultimate sacrifice.
I invite you to listen in and gain more insight into what you want that day to be. Because we are Delight Your Marriage we focus a lot on marriage, but we will all stand before Jesus one day and this is good practice :)
Love,
Belah
PS - Maybe you're considering launching into a healing season for your marriage in the New Year -- if so, sign up for a free Clarity Call at delightyourmarriage.com/cc
PPS - A recent lady graduate:
"Years ago I prayed to God for a short life. I didn't want to break my marriage vow, but I didn't see how I could be happy with him and it was getting harder as the children became adults.
Death seemed to be the only acceptable answer. I was obviously very unhappy.
Now I enjoy spending time with him, look forward to dates and vacations, and we laugh and work things out together. I believe we are a great team! It's a miracle that we enjoy and like each other again.
Physical intimacy is better than ever. He cares about me and I feel secure. When we come together physically, we feel closer and both of us look forward to it!
I miss him when he gets busy with work and would be devastated if something happened to him."
Maybe you're transformation is next. Learn more in a free Clarity Call at delightyourmarriage.com/cc
It's hard to discern (or even admit) if we are obsessed.
So here's the definition:
"an idea or thought that continually preoccupies or intrudes on a person's mind."
Is your marriage an obsession?
Or is God's will an obsession? (And your marriage is an important part of God's will for you.)
I encourage you to consider what God's will is for you in this next season.
It's all about priorities.
If God is your first priority then everything else falls underneath.
He puts all of our lives into perspective.
Marriage shouldn't put all of our lives in perspective. It must be God first, then we can rightly serve our spouse well.
I want to invite you to rightly obsess over God's will and put marriage in its proper place so that it's healed and somewhat on "autopilot" so you can get on with God's will for your life.
Listen in to understand more about what this means for you.
(I have an exciting announcement included in our conversation today, I'd love for you to hear it!)
Love,
Belah
PS - If you're in a really hard place or even a really great place, I encourage you to get on a Clarity Call.
Maybe (as a gent emailed me today) your marriage is a 10, but you feel you need to take this course because YOU need to become the man/woman your spouse needs, then we'd love to help.
delightyourmarriage.com/cc
A recent grad shared: (we try to never reuse testimonial quotes in multiple emails jfyi)
“I've grown a lot spiritually, I had thought that I had always been a pretty good Christian...but realized that I was very selective in when and how I followed God's word. I feel a lot closer to God, and now realize that I can't really do marriage well on my own and truly need Him.
The program was great! It so aligned with what I needed...
If people seem stuck, don't hesitate to push...I know we should take that initiative ourselves but sometimes a spark or catalyst can help.
I really believe in what you're doing...it's the best program out there… and think this program can really help a lot of people."
Learn more at delightyourmarriage.com/cc
After 33 years of marriage, they were disconnected.
At that point, they were sleeping in separate bedrooms.
Maybe you're at a spot where it's hard to have hope because it has been SO hard for SO long.
Jacques is here to say, even when only you do the work, it can change.
Glory to God.
Blessings,
Belah
PS - Could your marriage be one of the next ones to transform? Schedule a free Clarity Call at delightyourmarriage.com/cc. You don't have to, but what if you do?
Quote from a client...
Before the program: "My biggest struggle coming into MR was openness with my wife about what I was thinking and feeling and fear of asking her about what was going on in her life. I had just come out of therapy for my addiction of lust and porn and trust was a big issue. I wanted her to know that she was the only one for me and I didn't know how to do that.
I knew our marriage could be so much more but didn't know how to make that happen. It was a constant weight on me that made my everyday life like walking around on eggshells."
After the program: "DYM has given me the confidence and tools to be able to handle difficult situations with my wife. It has given me such a better understanding of how my wife thinks and what is important to her. I have learned that I have to be the leader of the relationship. I love how the program was based on scripture in the bible. I learned how God wanted us to treat our wives and then how to do it. Surprisingly it has helped with my porn and lustful addiction. Now I respect women and my wife as they are all God's daughters. I am so excited for the next stage of my marriage."
There wasn’t peace at home, kids constantly saw us arguing, I didn’t want to be at home, I was doing many things on my own with the kids because my husband didn’t want to do things with me, I was craving for other male attention who valued me.”
After the Delighted Wife Program:
"My heart has softened and I can now see the brokenness in my husband, that he was just a very wounded soul. He was trying to love me and wanted this marriage to work but he had no clue how to go about improving it and was instead making things worse.
Wholehearted intimacy. Not arguing for a long time and the atmosphere has completely shifted, there is peace at home and he is a much happier and better father to the children...
Impacted everything, it turned everything around. My husband is now loving, patient, caring, and a very present and patient father.”