We are thrilled to be sharing Joel's Transformation Story with you today!
After 28 years of marriage, Joel felt disconnected from his wife. He was unsure of what to do and or where the disconnection was coming from. In searching for answers, he spoke with his sister about it and was introduced to the DYM podcast. After a few episodes and some topics really hitting home, he signed up for the Clarity Call and was accepted into the Masculinity Reclaimed course.
Through the Course, not only did Joel begin to see a change in his marriage - with the reconnection he had longed for, more playfulness, and a better understanding of how to love his wife well - but his wife even began adding his Coaching Calls to their calendar! She was THAT impressed by the changes!
We hope this transformation story inspires you and reminds you that the work that you do for your marriage does matter.
Love,
Belah & Team
PS - If you are looking to reconnect with your spouse, learn how to love them better, or figure out just how in the world to bring playfulness back - we would love to talk with you.
delightyourmarriage.com/cc
PPS - Here is a quote from another recent graduate:
“The program has given me the tools I need to have a thriving marriage. More importantly, the program has changed my mindset and outlook. I now have a renewed hope that a thriving marriage is possible! I no longer fear that our marriage will end. Our intimacy isn’t just physical like in the past. It is now emotional, spiritual, and physical. It is new and AMAZING!”
Maybe you've been incredibly successful in your business pursuits.
You're the kind of guy who sees a target, attacks the target and brings home the game.
And year after year every chart goes up and to the right.
But unfortunately, what you have done that got you great success in business is what has actually torn down what you have wanted to build.
I mostly focus on men in this episode because I find they often need this sort of clarification of how God designed marriage.
The truth: marriage is extremely different than business :)
A businessman might see a problem and want to fix it, when he uses the same tools that have made him successful in business with his wife...
It drives her away.
It makes her feel she's not good enough.
Or it causes her to grow cold towards him.
The strategies that work in growing your business, conversing with coworkers, or motivating your employees will not be the things that work in the closer, intimate relationship you have with your spouse.
So, if you feel you're throwing punches in the dark and nothing is working and it's incredibly frustrating -- based on the success you've come to expect with your typical approach to life... then this episode is for you.
Blessings,
Belah & Team
PS - If we can help you with your marriage, we invite you to schedule a Clarity Call at delightyourmarriage.com/cc
This is a free consultation for us to see if we are a fit for your needs and if we would expect wonderful results from a program.
PPS - Here is a quote from a recent graduate:
“I have come to realize that I need to be very intentional every day about romancing my wife. Especially recently, with some new business pressures, I have realized how easy it is to slip. Interestingly, I am seeing some significant effects in my daughters. Both of them are saying that they would like to have marriages like my wife and I have. Praise God!!!”
Listening is a superpower.
It makes people feel heard and safe and brings down defenses. It lets them know they are cared for.
In today's society, it can be hard to have a conversation without wanting to defend a point in disagreement or wanting to make sure your opinion is heard, as well. It's even worse when this seeps into your marriage.
Today we are going to be talking about how to have a productive disagreement without losing connection, how to stay on the same team (even when you think your spouse is totally wrong!), and how to be a curious and compassionate listener, even in the midst of disagreement.
We hope this episode blesses you and leads to many wonderful, deep conversations and a deeper understanding and connection with your spouse.
Love,
Belah & Team
PS - You can find the Marital Health Assessment mentioned in today's podcast here: https://delightyourmarriage.com/health/.
PPS - If you're thinking this listening stuff is great for someone else, but not you and your spouse- they never listen, they don't want to share, they are so closed off... we would love to talk to you and see if we can help. https://delightyourmarriage.com/cc
PPPS - Here is a quote from a recent graduate:
"My biggest struggle coming into the program was hard heartedness, unforgiveness and resentment... It's required me to be more reflective. It has shown me the power of positive habits that build into an attitude of gratitude. I am learning to see my wife in a kinder light. I am spending more time connecting with my kids and have been more patient, kind & gentle with them. I am becoming a better friend, messaging and calling friends more, and making time for them."
In honor of Darcy's anniversary this week, I wanted to re-release this episode! I’m excited to share that my wonderful friend Darcy is here to share her story and advice for you!
She is actually our wonderful Office Manager, and she reads all of your emails and prays for all of those who are suffering and in such difficulty in their marriages. She often weeps for you, listeners, and she truly, truly cares about you and feels your pain for those of you who are in need of hope.
Her conversation today reflects what God has done in her and what she prays He does in you. The rest of this message are from Darcy:
—
Thank you, Belah, for giving me this opportunity.
God is doing and has done so many amazing things and what an honor to testify of His power, love, and goodness!
*“Because your steadfast love is better than life, my lips will praise you. So I will bless you as long as I live; in your name, I will lift up my hands.” Ps. 63:3-4
I pray that God speaks to and encourages many weary hearts through this podcast.
“Hope deferred makes the heart sick, but a desire fulfilled is a tree of life.” Prov. 13:12
This is my prayer for you:
Father, thank You for the one listening to this podcast. Thank You that You know them…intimately! You know how many hairs are on their head. You know their hurts, desires, and joys.
You desire good for them and desire them to know and experience You and Your love in ways that will reveal to them the abundant life that You have offered to any who will come to You in faith in Jesus and walk in the power of the Spirit of God.
Father, you see the tears. You see the brokenness. Even more incredibly, You care about them and have the power to do something good with them.
God, You know that we so often want to run from hurt and pain! Teach us to trust You…to take You at Your word…
I encourage you to read this scripture as though you’ve never read it before:
*”For I consider that the sufferings of this present time are not worth comparing with the glory that is to be revealed to us. For the creation waits with eager longing for the revealing of the sons of God. For the creation was subjected to futility, not willingly, but because of him who subjected it, in hope that the creation itself will be set free from its bondage to corruption and obtain the freedom of the glory of the children of God. For we know that the whole creation has been groaning together in the pains of childbirth until now. And not only the creation, but we ourselves, who have the firstfruits of the Spirit, groan inwardly as we wait eagerly for adoption as sons, the redemption of our bodies. For in this hope we were saved. Now hope that is seen is not hope. For who hopes for what he sees? But if we hope for what we do not see, we wait for it with patience.
Likewise, the Spirit helps us in our weakness. For we do not know what to pray for as we ought, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groanings too deep for words. And he who searches hearts knows what is the mind of the Spirit, because the Spirit intercedes for the saints according to the will of God. And we know that for those who love God all things work together for good, for those who are called according to his purpose.” Rom. 8:18-28
Thank You, Father, that You NEVER lie! Thank You that we can cling to You and Your promises through every storm, every hurt, every disappointment, and everything that we face on this planet! People may fail us, but You NEVER do!
You use the trials and pain to teach us greater things. You may seem far off at times, yet You are more interested in the details of our lives than we could ever imagine! Teach us to relinquish everything we hold onto to You, trusting that You will never disappoint…we wait on You.
…in Jesus’ name, I ask this, amen.
So, dear listener, remember:
“The Lord is near to the brokenhearted and saves the crushed in spirit.” Ps. 34:18
* ”Delight yourself in the LORD, and he will give you the desires of your heart.” Ps. 37:4
And let me ask you:
How long was Joseph a slave and a prisoner?
How long did David wait for the throne or Abraham and Sarah wait for a son?
How long were the Jews in captivity?
Hebrews 11 tells us that some died not yet having received the promise, yet they looked forward in faith and believed what God said.
God asked Abraham to sacrifice the fulfillment of His promise – Isaac. Abraham was willing. He even got up early the next morning to do so. Likely not because he felt like it or wanted to, but because he believed God.
Husband…wife…are you willing to believe God? Are you willing to sacrifice what you hold dear and trust God to deliver on His promises regardless of how bad things look and regardless of how long it takes?
Faith fleshes out in obedience. Because Abraham believed God, he acted like he believed God.
What does that look like for you in your situation today?
He is worthy! He is faithful! You and I can bank on it!
Grateful for His presence and His great and precious promises,
Darcy
Office Manager
*(All verses are in the ESV Bible version – emphasis mine)
PS If you would like to grow in your walk with God in many various ways, and particularly how that relates to your marriage, we invite you to schedule a free Clarity Call with our very caring Clarity Call advisor – click here to schedule
A testimonial from a course graduate:
“I was very, very nervous to try this program out. My wife still doesn’t know about my involvement and I was very nervous about doing this without her knowledge.
But it has really exceeded any expectations I had about what might happen in my marriage.
I do believe I will talk with my wife about MR, in the right time, and I think it will go just fine. But if that is the reason you are hesitating, I can tell you…it really can work!”