"It's part of life."
But it really is, IF we're growing. If we numb and distract ourselves away from God's growth opportunities, we can really get off track.
When you have made a mistake, own it, apologize for it, learn from it, and tether yourself to Christ BECAUSE of it.
We can't do this on our own. We're not supposed to. And if you think you can, sin is probably getting in there.
When you make a mistake it is a grace.
"It is His kindness that leads us to repentance." Romans 2:4
How cool is it that he redirects us on THIS side of eternity.
Accept a failure as a gift.
A gift to grow.
A gift to say "never again".
A gift to completely change everything.
A gift to make an important tweak.
A gift to make a life-altering habit change. (Yes, habits alter our lives... more on that another time!)
Bravo to you for growing. Bravo to you for listening to God's leadership.
"His ROD and His staff, comfort me." Psalms 23:4
His rod is his direction and redirection -- we get to be comforted by the fact that He will not let us go off the path into danger. If we allow his rod which is firm and instructive to guide us.
Listen in for encouragement and the knowledge that your failure is a GOOD opportunity for God's work in you.
PS - If you're ready to see how God can transform your marriage possibly through a DYM program, you can sign up for a FREE Clarity Call with me or a member of my team here: delightyourmarriage.com/cc
If you were looking for marriage counseling, you would first have a consultation to see if you'd be the right fit. That's what a Clarity Call is.
But the real value you get is seeing what's under the surface in your relationship and discerning what God wants in your marriage and life. Would love to have you on! delightyourmarriage.com/cc
When she says, "We just don't communicate," or "You never listen,"...she is talking about this learnable skill.
Listen to her heart. Listen to understand. Listen to let her know you understand and care.
Not listening to respond or even defend yourself.
It is to listen to her emotions and sit with her in her pain. To be curious and to give her a safe space to share. When she shares her emotions (her heart) vulnerably, you are witnessing courage.
You are on sacred ground.
Tread carefully and gently.
For Mother's Day, just the other weekend --
Did I get diamonds?
A weekend getaway at a fancy resort?
A stainless steel, 14-quart Instant Pot Duo Mini 7-in-1 Electric Pressure Cooker?
Sure those would have been good gifts.
what I got was priceless:
Hours of his full attention.
He got excited about what I shared.
He cared about what matters to me -- how I'm growing,
how I was feeling,
and genuinely wanted to hear more.
He noticed my feelings -- wanted to hold space for them --
and held me emotionally...
And...well...did what I teach you to do in today's episode.
It was far more fulfilling than those other things ever could be.
(Just FYI, when he surprised me with my favorite wine, beautiful glasses, roses, and sitting together in a gorgeous spot in Central Park...that did add to the intimately fulfilling conversation. :)
PS If you'd like to have a conversation with me or a member of my team about what's going on in your marriage and see if one of my programs can help you, apply for a Clarity Call: delightyourmarriage.com/cc
Delight Your Marriage has been awarded in the Top 30 Relationship Podcasts for 2018, 2019, 2020 & 2021!
"Through working with Belah, my marriage is saved and thriving, and I am forever changed and grateful."
It's ok to not feel amazing in your marriage all the time. This is real life and sometimes things happen.
Someone gets sick.
Someone is tired.
Someone was selfish.
Someone wasted away their entire Saturday watching superhero movies and didn't feel like being an intentionally seductive tigress.
(This last one was definitely me).
Your spouse is wonderful, but even in the best marriage there will be moments of the negative side of the wave. And that's ok.
If you're a 2 out of 10 and on the best days you're a 4 out of 10...
I want you to get to a 9 out of 10 and the bad days are just a 7 out of 10.
So, get your marriage to a better spot but when you're up there in your healthiness, expect waves.
Also, if you want to work with Belah to get your marriage healthy (up your marriage to an 9 or 10), find out more by getting on a call with her or a member of her team to see if it's a good fit.
Fill out an application here: delightyourmarriage.com/cc